"There’s a lot less fear but still a lot of stigma, if that makes sense? Like, there are really good meds available now, and HIV is very far from a death sentence (in the US, at least). It drives me insane sometimes because people often only think of relationship experience through a 'heteronormative lens.' For instance, my brother saying, 'Well, it must not have been a serious relationship since you never introduced him to the family,' is harmful because it takes no consideration for the real lived experience of an oppressed minority." So when I’d tell my family about him, and try and explain why we didn’t take photos together, just photos of ourselves at the same places, they thought I was making up an entire relationship. I also wasn’t able to introduce him to my family out of his fear of somehow being outed by accident. "My longest relationship was 13 months, and I never met his family because he wasn’t, and still isn’t, out. I've gotten better about doing it anyway." " I wish I could hold my husband's hand when we're in public without having that anxiety that someone will start being an asshole to us. ![]() "Is he the man I want to be with, or simply the man I want to be."
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